This article is a collection of random things I have learned over my past almost 7 years of motherhood. They may not suit everyone but if even 1 point helps 1 person then I feel it was worth sharing this. It is an honest account of 10 things that upon realising/learning has made my life a little easier as a mammy, especially in the early, newborn days.
1.Breastfeeding – it does hurt at the beginning when the baby first latches on, and this is the case even if you have breastfed before (I thought after my first I wouldn’t feel a thing when my second starting to feed), I’d describe it as ‘wanting to say ouch initially’ but it should settle then – if it continues to hurt then ask for help to ensure the latch is right
2.Newborns skin can shed – when our first was about 6 days old her skin started to peel – being my first I was in a panic and rang the local pharmacy to ask what could be wrong/ what should I do. Thankfully the pharmacist was a father himself and reassured me this was normal and to use Aqueous cream when bathing her. Since then the only thing I use for bathing them until they are at least 6 months old is aqueous cream, and if I do notice any dry skin I use a little after the bath too
3.If it’s a boy point it down – my second child is a boy and for the first 3 days I could not understand how he was drenching himself everytime he weed resulting in me needing to do a full clothes change and cot change each time, and his nappy would hardly be wet!! Until I learnt this was a result of not putting things down when putting on his nappy….significant reduction in washing upon implementing this!
4.It’s ok to say to people not to call after a certain time – everyone is excited to see the new baby but if you have being up every few hours feeding, winding, changing the baby the last thing you might feel like is someone ‘popping in’ late in the evening. If anyone takes offence at you saying ‘do you mind calling before this time in the day’ or whatever way you want to say it then this person does not have yours or baby’s best interest and you can do without that person visiting
5.Having a section does not stop you breastfeeding even if the baby’s first feed was a bottle – when people would see me breastfeeding so many have said to me ‘oh I couldn’t do that as I had a section’. A c-section does not stop you breastfeeding, yes you are sore and yes you might have to try different positions to find what works for you and baby but it is completely false to say it is a reason not to breastfeed.
6.Some days will be hard and you’ll think what the….but it does get easier. And it’s ok to have a day where you don’t want to see or talk to anyone. If these feeling don’t lift please talk to your GP or Public Health Nurse
7.Mother and baby groups / breastfeeding groups can be really helpful but some can actually tip you closer to the edge- if you’re not comfortable or are coming away feeling worse than when you went in find a different group to go to. I found some of these groups brilliant and would say it was all that got me through some weeks on my first in particular. But there was one group that I went to that every time I left I just always felt like I was doing everything wrong all because there was 1 or 2 very judgemental/ opinionated mothers there.
8.It’s ok to stay in your pjs all day at the beginning & it’s also ok to have random pyjama days throughout your maternity leave – you have just grown a baby and are now minding that baby probably pretty much 24/7 so if you want a day in the PJs take it and enjoy it
9.It’s ok to decline invites to nights out/ to weddings – even if your baby is a few months old, only leave them when you are ready – I’ve never met a mother who wishes she went out and left her baby more often.
10.You don’t need to move baby out at 6 months, that age is set as the earliest you should move them out but it doesn’t mean you have to move them out at that age. My oldest didn’t leave our room until she was 3! We had 2 cots in the room at that stage (and our room was not big by any standards). The second went out to sleep in the same room as his sister when he was about 2 and 5 months and the third is still there and will be past 2 also by the time she leaves! Even when they do move out they regularly make their way back in during the night. This can be hard at times but this time will pass too and I know I’ll miss hearing little footsteps coming into the room in the middle of the night, followed by ‘mammy, mammy can I come in and cuddle you’ – how could anyone say no to a request like that!
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